positive!!!

I am not angry, perhaps just want to find someone to sympathe me...I am so silly to have this kind of though...
Today played netball...quite fun...
I don't want them to be dependent as we are going to leave them soon...however...I will remind myself to remind him...I will do my best for it...

People get tired after too many thing...am I a coward or ? can anybody understand that kind of feeling?...I feel so bad when seeing them being so busy but I am so free...feel so bad that I didn't really get to help them but creating more trouble to them...

I am so confused...I am tired from all this but I couldn't just stand there and watch...I didn't really do anything great...all are so terrible...

I am seeking for help....seeking for positive power....something that wake me up from this terrible darkness....is like a hidden bom in my heart, able to explore at anytime...

for him, things will stop by today, as I write over here, I will definitely do it.
sorry that I keep making u guy's day so boring with almost the same topic...I will not talk bout it anymore. I don't want to give myself any hope anymore.(does it consider as hope or it should be a illusion of my own)....I wont step the first steps for sure, if so do u, then let's end at here...we are friend ONLY....

cheer for my heart, cheer for the freedom of my soul...I will clean my sky with positive energy...
wenshu, please do not feel sad/dissapointed/angry anymore in the future, widen your view and enlarge your heart...accept what couldn't be accepted, understand what it should be...jia you, I know you will make it de^^

I am a silly girl...

now I finally understand when the bond between two people start changing, everything changed...
Thing might not be the same as past when this happened...
When your friend become your boss, relationship between two of you will be different eventually...
You will have to change the way you treat the person too...
now i understand why my friend said so...
"I don't want you to treat me as friend first because I want us to be together. Thing will be different when I am your friend first..."
now I agree with it....I am keep cycling around the same question...I still don't have the answer, time is eating my patient...perhaps this is the answer....we will always be senior and junior, vp n s...
things will get better when times goes by....

what a busy day

Today full with activities.
Morning join Sakura Ceria...circle the lake...wow, long time didn't run, is tired man!
haiz, malay style of aerobic really not my cup of tea...I don't feel like warmed lo....result, I feel bit pain at both my legs...

before the next activities, went to BRC to photocopy things, fortunately the person over there is nice^^....finally we don't need go so far to photocopy le, it even provide binding survice^^....but BRC is kind of far from my hostel....:x

after that, watches a basketball competition, three to three....hehe, saw a awesome guy, he is good in basketball, keep score for three point ball...almost all the ball he shot goal....^^....too bad...is not available....just kidding la....

Back to hostel for the follow on activity....then went HEP there for club...thanks toro and hilary for coming and accompany me over there although they know we are not going to pool today...perhaps this is the main reason why I am so moody in the morning...
coincidently....we met him over there....haha....I just realised that I always able to track smile on his face....^^....that really bright my day better
(perhaps...this is the part that make my day...Hilary asked him why didn't asked shu to follow, he just say I didn't wanna follow...:p...rubbish...why I mind bout it so much....stupid....)

Once I have step out the first step, I am ready for everthing that follows...
quoted from somebody words....

toro shared something with me, although I didn't able to help him lot....but I sincerely hope that he will get to figure it out....don't be greedy my fren, find time or a person to sit down and think about it ya^^....everything will gonna be fine^^

later will be the 4hours plus movie session....oh my god, I need to don my assignment by today, if not I will die very soon....tomorrow going for Bola Jaring selection (great, I forgot to ask toro bout it....haiz....)...it will be a tired day again....hopefully everything will be done within my planing....JIA YOU~!!!!

a bit blue sky...

Don't ask me, I also don't know why am I so moody today.
Didn't had dinner, coz don't feel so though I am hungry now.

I felt scared, worry that there are things that I forgotten
I felt scared, worry that I didn't do the thing well
when failure keep on repeating, I feel so sad, feel so useless and hopeless...power low....
when I am not being trusted, I feel so meaningless that what I had did...

I really don't like this kind of feeling...is reducing my power...I feel there is something pressing on my chest...something unfinished....

Today planned to watch Legion...but I cancelled the date....though I really wish to go.....

Couldn't find anything that cheer my heart....

hopefully the dark blue sky will faster been blow away by the warm warm winds....

where is my direction

Today I just realised that I am going to graduate soon. Final Year Project(FYP) is just around the corner.
Now we learning the technique of preparing FYP, and yet I couldn't figure out what title I would like to have. I am struggling...

...why I always struggle at the cross road....

follow your interest? something that is easy? something that you will learn lot?
what is my interest? I am not very sure too....should it be something that i might work in the future....

I understand the theory of choosing but I just dunno how to make the decision....

I do not like this feeling......


ps:haha, i am not a decision maker...not even for my marriage...i think....sweat....

warm welcome

A huge hug for two cute little baby in my house^^
cannot wait to see them when I got back home
hope they will like me too.
will try to upload their picture over here once i got it

hope mum will be able to bear with them
they r still so young....hopefully they are obedient....is the greatest news I had for yesterday^^

Fate had bring us together, and bonded together.
I pray for your health and happiness....
I will definitely love you guys though I wont have much chances to spend time with you^^



muacks~my beloved hitam and cookies^^



ps:i wonder who give this name, sound so cute and sweet...^^

is it a bad day?

Yesterday was a adventures day.

Lost on the way to salon, then lost way back from MJC some more.
but fortunately we manage to get a short cut back to uni.
Besides that, car brake down in uni cause no petrol. It was so sacry, but fortunately we are not out of uni yet. Haha, later on, they are so phobia, we eventually perol RM10 for the car.

I feel so bad as my little junior quarrel with his girlfriend as he did not manage to get to her on time. I hope everything will be fine after this.
However, we still manage to settle everything on time, just poor Ram need to burn the midnight oil for his assignment....

thank you guy for accompany me over, the first time having full car of guy^^
(though this is their responsibility^^)
I really have to admit that Hilary is sweet, too bad, he is bit young for me...Jia you for the one you like^^

Today is the day voting for MPP, I hope my friend will manage to win with a good post^^.

ps: this is kind of weird post...not consistence...bear with me...

About this blog

hmm, I am not very sure did I ever mentioned the reasons why I want to start writing a blog?

a plain paper is not a boring paper, but a paper that is awaiting you to colour it.

a place for me to write down my memory
a place for me to share my feelings and experience
a place for those who love me to know my situation
and a place for those I love to know me more...

a plain paper accept everything and understand everything that I wrote on it....

thank you for those who pass by and those who concern
since i had posted then i will have the preparation for others to read it and comment it.

I will work hard for it...^^

My roommate

My roommate in Uni.
She is cute and active girl. Hardworking but more toward playing stuff. She love to dance but shy to show to others. She is very naughty too, heard from her course mate, she is a little monkey in her class. (haha, I never doubt bout that)
I like to talk to her lot, sometime it seem like I am lecturing her.
I really enjoy those time with her. Sadly, now we are not roommate anymore but neighbor. I know she still concern me a lot. Thank you Slyvia^^
I still remember those time I taking care of her when she is sick and injured, she really is a little monkey, also injured here and there.
She has a very cheerful characteristic too, always make me laugh. Her understanding always make my blue heart feel better.
Her ambition is to become a successful person, having live that she desired, giving good life for her family.
I know she will make it, with her determination and cheerful charater^^
Jia you!!!!
all the best^^

This is a blog for you^^



ps:kind of messy.sorry.

A message to you

Thank you for accompany me writing that report. I really sincerely appreciate it. I even let you wait for me. (:p seem I always make you wait...sorry...)

Actually there is something I want to tell you, but I don't know to start with it.

Yesterday, on our way back uni, what they said and their expression make me feeling like something fishy.

I don't want to make any guess, as this will make me feel terrible if the answer is not what I think.

Sorry cause I always don't let you continue

Sorry for avoiding some of your question

Sorry for seldom praising you.

Thank you for helping me so much.

Thank you for your random caring.

Thank you for always waiting for me.

No matter what will happen in the future, what is the bond that connect us together, believe me, you will be one of the person which I will not forget rest of my life

Thank you^^

Stupid ink

This is my first time refilling my printer. Great, I mess up the colour, I insert yellow colour into red colour....faint....

All my hand dye with my printer ink. Going to buy a new cartridge...oh....my purse ache....

ps: apologize for the blur picture

Is turning yellow

It had been raining for almost one week over here. Cloth couldn't dry even I hang under the fan. It was so cold over here.

That evening when i walk from my room, I saw this weird scenary, not only the sky but all things turn yellow.

What is happening to our earth?!

Random

This is just a random post. I finally found the title column. Never notice it for so long until just now....sorry....

Met him at CAIS...adui, come for free lunch and free cert some more. Why am I so stupid, sacrifice my holiday and outing just like that. Fortunately I amend with online editting my blog and search for some books (sotong shu, forgot to ask him which book better)

Some time I really doubt about my ability....why I always make the wrong decision...because I never trusted myself...

I think between me and him, everything are just illusion.

Thanks for those who concern^^

ps: I will try to add more picture for my blog as I know people don't like to read.

Head of Department

Our Head of Department is a great person. She love us a lot, think for us in all aspect. Even thought we are naughty, results are bad, she never gives up us, but hoping one day we will be her proud. I really very touches for what she told us that day. Thank you.

Everything is about what is you aim at the end. No matter how many barrier we faced along the road, remember what you want and push your best for it, you will definitely make it.
No matter what others opinion about us, don't let it make you down but energy which push to a higher point.

Fighting!!Plants!!!!

Thank you^^

Outing burned...

My first outing to Blue Lake, Wind cave.....burn.....
Thanks for the Bengkel Penulisan....sien....

Sometime is about your decision. Eventually I can ask for the note from Aaron but I still decided to go over, how stupid I am. 8.30am to 1pm. I am going to have a boring morning. Perhaps this is a sign for me to save my money and study harder.

Sorry, I always make you guys dissapointed. Thank you for inviting me to join the outing. I sincerely apologize....

sien...

Cracked Heart

Now I know the answer. Althought I am not so into it yet, but my heart did cracked...Thanks for letting me know, love you^^.

Question: Whether choosing a guy that love you more than you love him or vice verse?

Time will answer for the question, because I don't even know what do I think and feel about him...haha...perhaps all this are just my imagination...

First outing in the year

Today we went out. I accompany my friend to reborn her haris. This is the first time I go out without a reason, just plainly accompany friend. The feeling was so nice, don't need to rush for time, just go anywhere that we like. I like the feeling of freedom^^
Today I realised I had found Kuching four special thing. After I confirmed the location, perhaps will post in the blog.

Thanks to my friend who bring us to the dessert shop, I really love dessert very much, and the restaurant. Althought I didn't have meal over there (she seem very dissapointed for that), I will definitely go again.

Thank you^^

First blog ^^

This is my first blog. I decided to type in English, hope throught this will help to enhance my writing skill. Please correct me if there is any super serious grammer mistake.

I will learn to write down my life, people who love me and people who I love in this blog. Writting my feelings and my opinion. Just as the title of my blog, a plain paper.

My life is a plain paper, waiting me to colour it. "Life is short if you just let it be like that"

Cheer for living^^